Quatorze's 3/22/2013

Quatorze's

❤ 生活簡單,就好。






嘿!嘿!嘿!;起始於2010-12-25。



3/22/2013

2013/03/22 14:08




-1-

最近突然很喜欢现代舞。
我相信,舞蹈是可以释放自我的。
虽然我不会跳舞。
但是,可以感受到那种张力。
有可能,是比文字更好的表达方式。

一个人,在屋子里摆奇怪的姿势。
莫名地行走,跳,转圈。
好像是在完成某种祭祀般让人摸不着头脑。



很多事,我们只是不会。
并不是不想。

我唱歌基本没音,一度很介意在别人面前唱歌。
不过,现在好像也无所谓了。




我现在或许知道,为什么会诞生艺术。
这些东西在最初的时候,只是为了去阐述表达一个“什么”。
有些人擅长,成了艺术家。
有些人蹩脚些,就是业余爱好者。


艺术其实没有高低之分。
你画的星空肯定不及梵高获得的赞美,然而,我们也并非为了获得这些吧。
表达,释放。
表达,释放。
表达,释放。





-2-

不是每个人都善良,但也不是每个人都手持刺刀,随时准备攻击你。



我们的社会教育有点小失败。
造成的局面是:没有谁是值得真正相信的。
进一步造成的尴尬是:你诚实,别人千方百计来确认你是不是骗人了。
心想:哪有这样的好事发生。


这真是令我哭笑不得。



我觉得,他有可能是。。。巴拉巴拉。。
我觉得,他是故意的。。
我觉得,他是想。。。


噢!。




干嘛那么累去猜测别人是要说这句话做这件事来伤害你,哪怕这句话这件事看起来好像和“坏的”一点都不沾边。
唉。







-3-

后悔这种东西,真的是很难让人释怀的。
虽然说,你再后悔事情也不会改变。
但,没有人可以听得进劝。

我有时候在睡觉前,突然想到一件事。
噢。当时怎么那么蠢那么干了。
然后大叫一声“啊——————”,躺倒。


这种临时从抽屉缝里掉出来的过期稿纸,发黄,字迹歪曲。
只不过,你可以抛弃任何证明过去的东西,你怎么可能抛弃你自己。
抛弃不了那些傻兮兮场面留下的“我怎么那么二百五”的记忆。


这就是我偶尔会庆幸自己记性很差的原因。
让这种概率降到最低吧。吧。吧。






-4-


嫉妒



嫉妒这个词,很不错。
我一度将它归入邪恶的词汇,后来它只是阴暗的,现在,它好像还蛮可爱。


我讨厌嫉妒的情绪,因为这只能证明自己是无能的,自己是恶劣的。
所以,我也曾经非常喜欢用羡慕这个词。好像比较善良。


七宗罪里,有一项是嫉妒对么。
噢~我真的真的觉得,偶尔的嫉妒或许是有益身心的。
太满足于自己的现状,也不见得是好事。





-5-

前几天melo打电话给我。
我和他说,我不考警察了,因为我没办法做视力矫正,留后遗症的可能很大。
他说,不管怎么样,别放弃法语。

我感觉,这是我目前听到最顺耳劝解我对于法语态度的话。
我想了想,他是对的。





-6-

老爹剪过了头发,等待随时的入院和手术。

前两天,一条金鱼因为吃太多连续在水面上漂浮挣扎多天无果后终于安享极乐。
我变得更加敏感,总觉得不是什么好的兆头。
虽然它这种撑死的死法,真的让我哭笑不得。


家里的杜鹃,开的很盛了。
我想想,这也许是希望。
给它拍了照,在insta里起名叫hope。

关于这件事,没有对很多人提起。
只是想,默默承担些东西。在这个世界上,生老病死,屡见不鲜,自己是知道的。
每个人都要面对,又何必大惊小怪。


我每天保持微笑。因为我看他每天都高兴的样子。
好像什么都没有发生,我也就当做什么都没有发生过。
我不再憧憬很遥远的东西,我终于知道他们有一天会被我失去的,这是真的。
我和他一起种下了一种不知名的花。我心想,要是会出芽的话是该多好的。


我以前反感的和家庭有关题材的东西,觉得是婆婆妈妈的。
前两天继续翻看目送的时候,却一遍遍被感同身受。
我所遥想的未来里,逐渐苍老的手,还握着我,是何等幸福的事。


我无可救药的敏感,让我不停在小角落无声哭泣。
我只要在你们面前坚强快乐就可以。
我不允许自己再次在你们面前流眼泪。
所以,除了躲起来,没有更好的办法。


我还是那个我啊。
只是比起从前,更加知道现在的可贵。
那拜托原谅我,动不动就哭的脾气。




-7-

Miss D.D
& Mavis





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